Friday, October 26, 2012

Slow Down Crazy


Do you know a girl like this? Aaaand how does it make you feel? Like you just want to jump into serious committed relationship, right? ...

Guys complain about this a lot. They don't want to ask some girls out because then the chick will freak out. If I were asking a guy out because I wanted to get to know him and have fun, it would be really bad if he got all crazy. By crazy, I mean being possessive, aggressive, saying we had some sort of commitment, telling other people we were "dating, naming our future children, etc.

I wonder where this breed of crazy comes from in our LDS dating culture. I guess, like I talked about before, there is a lot of pressure on us to get married young. I also wonder if it maybe comes from immaturity. If you have been in a long, serious relationship, you know that it takes a lot of work and experience. If you haven't, and you're looking forward to a serious relationship, you may want to jump in early. like scarily early.

I would say that girls are more likely to do this in our culture, but there are guys who do it too. My roommates would come home with wild stories of guys that were too aggressive and moved too fast. It's a hard line to walk. We girls go nuts when guys move too slow and we freak out when they move too fast. What's the perfect speed? I don't know. I think everyone has a different speed.

In my relationship with my husband, I was ready for us to take our relationship up a level about a week or two before we did. And I'm glad we didn't take it up a notch the second I felt ready to. When we did, I felt a lot more confident about it. It's a hard process, but you'll have to do it! Just relax. Be calm. But don't wait around for a bum (guy or girl) that leads you down a year long commitment-less path.

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